The Daily Beast


The Readerlessblob Monster by coltonjakob
October 29, 2007, 10:30
Filed under: Beastly Files | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The Readerlessblob Monster

This monster is a blob; it has no legs, no arms, no head, no sex organs, no appetite, it scares people with it’s lame readlessness. All scientist that have studied this monster both wonder “Why does it even exsist?” “What idiots created this readerless crap?” “I sure hope they don’t kill themselves.” It is rumored to be located second to last when you search for “The Daily Beast” on www.Google.com. It grows bigger once a day………………..it’s depressing.

hey wait a second……………….Andy isn’t this our blog……… Damnit



Fuscharupamiki Tooty by Aldo Otero

The Fuscharupamiki Tooty has had 9 different sightings in the past 9 years and all sightings were on the 29th of February at about 8-12 in the morning and night local times. Awkwardly all the sightings had also happened when a meteor strike has just happened.

The descriptions change very very slightly with every sighting but all scientists who have studied have both agreed that it looks like a monster for sure and very definitely, but maybe not, we’re not … oh .. they’re not sure. The descriptions who have been studied by the team of highly trained scientiest have agreed that all 9 descriptions have concluded the following description:    It has very akward eyes at the back of the head along with alot of other charectiristics which should be in the front of the head. It has the legs of a giraffe all spotty and stuff. The tail of the black dog(the european beast) which has spikes on it known to hypnotize women and babies together and then give him the livers of the said people and then he puts them in a little black box which he carries around in his pocket, it is rumoured that he has big pockets. He has the head of a mushroom moth like it has the mushroom shape but it has the characteristics of a moth monster. It’s last location was somewhere in northern Russia. It is somewhere in the area between the 3 Russian villages of Это не реально, Reh Dogg, корма. The area where the monster is most likely residing is called the Rehforafake triangle of death. No babies or women have come out of it with their livers intact.